Friday, December 28, 2007

Peggy's prose for the proles

By Libby

I just got back from a couple of days at my sister's house and I'm catching on the news, looking for something to write about. I just can't wrap my head around the Bhutto assassination. It's too dark and complicated a story. I'm not ready to harsh my mellow with heavy thinking.

No, I was looking for something timely but insipid. Maybe even vacuous. Ah, Peggy Noonan. Perfect.

This is my 2008 slogan: Reasonable Person for President. That is my hope, what I ask Iowa to produce, and I claim here to speak for thousands, millions. We are grown-ups, we know our country needs greatness, but we do not expect it and will settle at the moment for good. We just want a reasonable person. We would like a candidate who does not appear to be obviously insane. We'd like knowledge, judgment, a prudent understanding of the world and of the ways and histories of the men and women in it.

I'll spare you the rest of her inane mumblings and tell you everyone made the cut except Clinton, Edwards and Huckabee. Edwards being disqualified solely on his hair. Giuliani qualified as reasonable but she doesn't like him anyway and she'll tell you why some day -- if she feels like it. Kucinich, Gravel and Paul don't even exist in her little netherworld.

She inspired me to invent my own slogan for 2008. Reasonably Intelligent and Honestly Thoughtful Political Commentary from our Over-Glorified Professional Pundits. I'm sick to death of overpaid, blithering mouthpieces of conventional Beltway blather who do more to poison our politics with their pointless pontificating, than all the partisan politicking in the world.

What a joke to see Noonan claiming to speak for the grown-ups of America when she in fact belongs to the elite cadre of arrested adolescents that dominate the major media. She's the voice of those favored few who have reduced the public dialogue to the level of teenage girls trading childish barbs over boyfriends. That they get to drive the political discourse is not funny at all.